When my oldest daughter was 14 or so my wife mentioned that she opened a Gmail account for her. I asked why? My wife answer seemed fine, she wanted to go on Facebook and needed an email address to set it up.
We had a social media business so I was fine with it. A couple years later my youngest followed suit, but she wanted to do Facebook and another account that I can’t remember.
Things went along good, we required them to friend us and viewed their posts casually as they happened. The posts were memes, sayings and photos typical teen posts. Rarely did we object about their posts. The few times we did we just explained why someone else out there in the inter/outer web world would perceive that particular post. We then asked them to delete it.
Then snapchat arrived. I heard about it here and there and knew the wife had an account that she snapped pictures or videos and sent snaps to the kids or her cousins. Sh*t got real fast, it became a scary social sharing application.
My youngest received the dreaded “nude lap snap” from a teenage boy she thought she knew. Previously the boy had sent pics of his room posters, of food at McDonalds and of him at a major league baseball game.
We contacted the local police moments after she told us.
Scarily the local police were unaware of this particular social app. We showed the police officers what snapchat was and gave a basic run down of how it was used and how it worked. They looked puzzled at her when she asked if they had a camera because she wanted a photo record of the young mans face and his naked lap on the police record. The police officer was still confused as he walked back from his car with his digital camera.
We all stood on the porch with anticipation. I was looking at the police while my daughter waited inside and my wife said to the officer, ready? She then replayed the snap, the officer exclaimed MYLANTA! as soon as he saw the young man’s snapchat image on the video. He took multiple digital photos with his camera. The officer had no idea this kind of social media existed. Well they got the mans photo, face, naked lap and all that he showed on the snapchat short video.
Kayla was called to come outside where we gathered for the investigation and was asked a few questions. Did she know the person, she said yes and told the officer his name….Jimmy somebody (names omitted to protect the accused) who attended her school. The officers thanked her and praised her for doing the right thing. We were proud parents.
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A few days later we heard from the police investigator that the young man in the video wasn’t her classmate Jimmy. Jimmy wasn’t the same Jimmy she knew. This Jimmy set up his account as a generic name (Jimmy’s last name was a very common one) and perpetrated his victimization by friending others like my daughter and sending naked lap photos – yes there are perverted people in the world unfortunately teaching our daughter a valuable lesson and us parents too.
So what do you do with kids on social media?
We taught both of our kids how to block and report inappropriate messages, photos and videos on snapchat and on other social media apps. Of course it happened again and they reported it within the app and when nudes arrived, they turned their eyes away.
Google social media app settings, google how to report items, there is no one streamlined way across social platforms. Most of all monitor their social media. Our daughters are now 16 and 20, we continue to monitor their posts. It’s not easy it’s just part of our parenting.
If you don’t have the time or tolerance to monitor your children, hire me. One of the services I offer is the Children’s Social Media Management package. It’s $100 to get started then about as much as your cable bill monthly. https://mariasconsulting.com/package-pricing/
You need to decide. The cable bill cost to know their being monitored online versus your kids online with no rules, no guidelines and no monitoring?
I’m a Dad. I prefer to protect my kids with guidance.
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